I’ve always wrestled with the paradox of feeling utterly normal and not quite fitting in. A feeling that has travelled with me in its various forms up to this, my fortieth year.
There isn’t much need to detail all aspects of my life with you, but if you have carried that feeling of somehow being a square in a round hole, then you will absolutely understand. After all, nothing too unusual about a square. It’s a regular shape. It just won’t feel like all the circles.
This metaphor could be widened and deepened, but again, no need. Because what I’m writing about and sharing is the wondrous glory of being a Solitary. I first heard of this term from a witch friend of mine when we were chatting about groups and learning, and work, and courses, and sense of self. And the term rang deep.
I’m a pretty sociable person. I also love and need my own company. I love to share ideas, discuss all sorts, I love to be stimulated, to study, to explore. I…don’t like fitting into templates. I don’t feel right following set exercises, I don’t want to dance in circles with fellow women. Unless it’s a sociable get together! I just don’t work in that way. I hear the call of my centre and my own guidance.
Being a Solitary, you follow your Own Way. There is nothing unsociable about working solo, about finding your own connections. You govern your own individual template, and that is liberating, powerful, and creative.
And this is the key thing that comes to me over and over: template. Create your own template. Live your own template.
If you are a Solitary, this will resonate. You are meant to do your work solo. You are not needing to seek out templates, but live your own, create your own, find your own. Not necessarily in that order.
I have found that when I embraced this, when I truly recognised this and REALised it, my path became even clearer.
And the really magical thing? All the other templates out there that I spent time agonising over? They Just. Don’t. Matter.
They are not for me, they are not mine, I am a Solitary, I Am Free!